Day 11 of the 21 Days of Romance Challenge.
I’m sitting here among three little dreamers, and one little anti-mushy boy. Enchanted is playing on the screen, with Giselle singing, “How do you tell her you love her? How does she know?” She’s twirling in her made-from-curtains dress, and it’s all just how we women wish it would be—seeing her as a part of a pair, as “made for one another” as Adam and Eve. Do I tell them that if they walk upstairs in their happily ever after castle, they are sure to find a sink full of dishes, laundry baskets brimming over, a stack of bills to be paid, doctor appointments to schedule, and old things smelling in the back of the fridge? Do I tell them that life tries its best to rob them all of the fairy tale endings?
I’m sitting here among three little dreamers, and one little anti-mushy boy. Enchanted is playing on the screen, with Giselle singing, “How do you tell her you love her? How does she know?” She’s twirling in her made-from-curtains dress, and it’s all just how we women wish it would be—seeing her as a part of a pair, as “made for one another” as Adam and Eve. Do I tell them that if they walk upstairs in their happily ever after castle, they are sure to find a sink full of dishes, laundry baskets brimming over, a stack of bills to be paid, doctor appointments to schedule, and old things smelling in the back of the fridge? Do I tell them that life tries its best to rob them all of the fairy tale endings?
I remember at eighteen,
with a shiny engagement ring on my finger, I’d been warned often that being
married was hard, very hard, and that it wouldn’t always feel “this” way. And I
knew that what they were saying was probably true, but I just couldn’t believe
them. I couldn’t let go of my dreams, my hope. It all felt so perfect, and I
believed in happily ever after endings.
I still do. I’m looking
forward to the best ending of all, walking on streets of gold, living in a
mansion, prepared for me. (And NO dirty floors to wash or dishes, hallelujah!)
I am beholding, no, a part of the most beautiful love story. I have a King
coming to claim me as His bride. Each day I live is in preparation for my wedding day, a
daily beautification for the moment of His arrival.
In an article on
infatuation, Ningthoujam
Sandhyarani writes, “In infatuation, one feels only emotion; on the other
hand, both emotion and devotion are involved in real love.” Rarely will you
encounter anyone who is looking for the artificial—just the emotions, we long
for both: emotion and devotion.
In a very insightful
article by Terri L. Saunders, she
writes, “Oxytocin is the bonding chemical. The higher the level of
oxytocin, the more empathic and less aggressive the individual will be.
Oxytocin also links the verbal centers in the brain and stimulates a nurturing
response with others. Higher levels of oxytocin in women enable them to
be good mothers and respond to the emotional needs of their spouse, children
and friends.” And the wonder in all this scientific information is that I am created
distinctly feminine, designed exactly the way His hands fashioned me, with
emotions, as a responder to others in this life. Men on the other hand, were
created so differently. Saunder’s points out, “A man’s pursuit of self-worth
and personal power is such a life-driving force, that in most cases it takes
priority over intimacy. If a man has developed a strong sense of self as
a man, he is better able to participate in a healthy intimate relationship with
a woman. She will feel his strength and derive nourishment from it.”
Finally she concludes, “In his book, ‘Intimate Communion,’ author David Deida explains… Women who desire a more sensitive, nurturing man may also miss the strong, passionate masculinity of the goal-driven male that was more prevalent in previous generations. Men may be confused by a woman’s aggressiveness and desire to control him. He walks a fine line between being the man she wants and offending her sensibilities. According to Deida, intimate communion is achieved when women learn to be more comfortable with their feminine essence and men embrace their masculinity, while both partners maintain an appreciation for the other’s needs.”
And this brings me back to the book that says it best, says it first, and the Author who designed our hearts this way. He wrote in into the beginning of the story:
Genesis 2:24
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Our fairy tale endings seek out oneness: oneness physically, emotionally and spiritually. But in an imperfect world, this is hard to come by. The missing pieces are what draws us to fulfillment in Him. He knows exactly what we are lacking in this life, because He created us for fullness in Him. He is the only One who can truly offer fulfillment in everyway. Even in love, in romance, we are ultimately always drawn back to Him.
My love sonnet from Him today is realizing this great heart’s need is by design. I was born to be drawn into His arms.
1 Peter 3:3-8
Do not let your
adornment be merely
outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— 4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit,
which is very precious in the sight of God….Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor
to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. Finally,
all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as
brothers, be
tenderhearted, be courteous;
Romancing your spouse as part of the: 21 Days of Romance Challenge?
Here are a few left-brained ideas to prove your love:
There is evidence that guys bond more through physical activity. Join him in one of his favorites: a bike ride, hike, game, or other adventure.
Back massage. (Should I type this in bold?)
Do something tangible for him: like a hair cut and shampoo, making his favorite batch of cookies, or cleaning out the garage.
Care to see where we've been on this 21 Days of Romance? (Seeking out romance in His word) You might like to see:
Day 5: God created us for romance. Will I choose it?
Romancing your spouse as part of the: 21 Days of Romance Challenge?
Here are a few left-brained ideas to prove your love:
There is evidence that guys bond more through physical activity. Join him in one of his favorites: a bike ride, hike, game, or other adventure.
Back massage. (Should I type this in bold?)
Do something tangible for him: like a hair cut and shampoo, making his favorite batch of cookies, or cleaning out the garage.
Care to see where we've been on this 21 Days of Romance? (Seeking out romance in His word) You might like to see:
No comments:
Post a Comment